Tuesday, September 11, 2012


1. People chewing with their mouths open. This started at church camp when I would be laying in a bunk pretending to be asleep and all the other girls would be gossiping and eating all night. I could hear the chips crunch and the soda get swallowed. Gag.

2. Sexism. This isn't really a pet peeve as much as a real issue. Which brings me to the last issue of The Paper. Our dear Mr. Boma's topic this week was laundry. Soiled clothes. He bitches about not knowing how to do it until he arrives at the conclusion that he'll just find a pretty girl to do it. I can't wait for the day life slaps him in the face.

3. When JP leaves his deodorant on the sink. We have the tiniest sink ever, and it only has room for our toothbrush holder and toothbrushes, the "fancy" soap (aka the non-health food store soap, reserved for guests because the good stuff is fucking expensive) and sometimes the health food store soap. . Though usually I put it back in the bathtub because we use it both places. Anyways, there is no room for his deodorant which inevitably gets knocked to the ground and is loud at times when Willow is asleep.

4. Leaving unnecessary lights on. Actually, wasting electricity in general, though the exception is when I'm home alone with Willow, sometimes I'll leave lights on to make it look like we're not asleep because I'm a paranoid crazy lady.

5. Annoying customers. Like the guy who complained that Obama made his truck a gas gussler the gas too high. Or the man who was wearing a shirt using the word gay as a derogatory term.

6. When people say I have an accent. Apparently I say "bag" like "beg".

7. Which leads me to- herb. The h is silent. Completely silent.

8. Ketchup. Not catsup.

9. People driving on shoulders. Actually, bad drivers. I get road rage like crazy sometimes. But people driving on the shoulder or making lanes drives me the most insane.

10. JP talking about the same things over and over again. I have heard about how a guy wanted $20 for a broken down pachinko machine that JP only wanted to pay $2 about 80 times since it happened. . Three days ago. I offered to help egg his house but he's too chicken.

In other news, people in Dwight pretty much all suck. Some random lady I have never met decided she was mad at JP's dad so she was all like. . I wonder how he feels about his granddaugher who was born out of wedlock and hoitytoity I'm a bitch-face. . .

Also, JP and I are thinking of getting married. Or civil unioned. . Civil unionized? One of those. Still trying to figure out the logistics but basically it comes down to if either one of us is ever mangled unconscious, we want the other one of us to be able to visit us in the hospital/make medical decisions for us. Romantic, eh? So after we figure out prenup stuff, how taxes will work, etc, etc, we'll tie the knot.


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